Right. I'm on the jury. For Real.
Shit.
Lessons learned this week:
1. Bring one of these, because it helps with the numbing of the ass.
2. No matter how good the notes you take are, your fellow jury members' notes will be different. And they will suck. With a vengeance.
3. Don't even fuck around with trying to get yourself voted the foreman... just sit back and let the village idiot volunteer, then take over.
4. Abandon all hope of following any instructions given by the judge. Even though you have a printed copy of them in front of you.
5. Make a big show of ripping up said instructions and tossing them about in complete frustration. This is drama at it's finest.
6. Hang that mother if it's necessary, but don't you dare give in to that cadre of conspiracy-loving, evidence-ignoring asshats.
